So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
