there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize