Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
