Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
