I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
