For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
