my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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