Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
