rhymes with "ouble enetration"
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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