Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize