Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
God, I missed his penis.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
