Whod you bang
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
