Screwed.edu
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Shame is for Republicans.
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