My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
