so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize