they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
