We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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