we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Dear god my vagina.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
