Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
