it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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