He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
me + whiskey = a bad person
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
