im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
