i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
