$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
