The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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