Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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