how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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