Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize