Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
