That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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