You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
He felt like a one man threesome
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
