Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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