apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
