For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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