Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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