Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I wish I could teleport
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
