He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I am naked and annoyed.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
