It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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