rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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