I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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