I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
