is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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