Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
