i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize