I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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