it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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