If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
