I'm jealous of your bromance
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
