i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I think a kid would responsible me up
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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