She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
