he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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