I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
