The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
